One Breath
by DrizztDo'UrdenNeverDies
Summary: A small one-shot about Mabel and Pacifica and how they get together. Rated T just to be safe, for (sort of) implied abuse. It really depends on how you interpret it. Enjoy! It's a series now, because people liked more than I thought they would.
1. One Breath

**Setting: Sometime after Northwest Mansion Mystery and before Weirdmaggeddon arc**

I breath in. And out again. Always breath. Because air is all that's between me and them. Air, oxygen, O2. Whatever it is, whatever you call it, I love it with all my heart. It is the invisible shield that keeps me safe from the yelling and scream that escalates to a stony, cold silence that lasts for days and nights at a time. Somehow I survive.

That very next morning I am out of the house before my parents can wake up. It is warm already, foreshadowing a hot day ahead. Sweat. Ugh. It ruins my makeup. I head over to Gravity Forest, where I can go to be alone. Sometimes I cry, sometimes I read, sometimes I get dirty or play in the mud or something. Sometimes, I even think of Mabel. It doesn't matter, because no will ever see me. I keep walking, even though I am thirsty and also have to cut through the Mystery Shack's front lawn. No one will see me. But then someone does. It's Dipper.

"Hey, Pacifica!" He starts walking over to me, and I silently cuss him out for not being blind.

"Hello, Dipper. How are you?" I ask with the most stuck up voice I can manage without sounding like my mother.

Dipper facepalms at this. "I thought we got past this, Pacifica."

I sigh. We did. I'm just not in the mood. "So sorry, I'll try again, your highness," I say this snootily, trying to get him to go away. He doesn't.

"Let me go get Mabel..." He trails off and I can't hear the rest of what he says as he walks away. But why Mabel?! She might be the only thing I need right now, but I don't want to see her.

He comes back a second later, Mabel on his heels. She looks happy, per usual. Lucky her.

"How are you, Pacifica?" She asks me, looking confused but still happy.

"I'm... fine."

"You don't look fine."

"I am."

"Come on, something's wrong! Tell me!" She pleaded, looking worried. But why would she be worried about me? I'm just a girl who is a little too mean to someone who I love, and Mabel is probably straight. I've heard she's going through a boy crazy phase from Dipper.

"Nothing's wrong."

"Pacifica, you look like someone took away your last Pitt cola and is holding it in your face, drinking it. We all know you love Pitt. You do not look fine!" Mabel shouted, taking my hands with her warm, soft ones, and giving me puppy eyes. Why? Does she know how much it hurts not to be able to hug her every time I see her? Is this the world's karma for being so mean to her? Dipper backed away quickly and went inside, saying something about this being up to me. Oh great, now I have an ultra empathetic Mabel on my hands. I'm not getting out of this alive.

"I do not." My excuses are getting lamer and I can hear my voice shake. Ironically for my history I was never great at lying, according to my parents.

"Come on," she says, taking my hand and running off into the forest. I, of course, can't say no to her. At least it's her I'm in love with, not some douche bag. She has the sweetest heart I know. We run through the forest with our hands intertwined, looking like one of those crappy romance movies I watch sometimes when reality gets to be just a little too much. Mabel seems to take joy in everything she sees. It is truly a wonderful sight, and just seeing her be so damn happy helps me hold my tears down a little bit. She stops at a small clearing, full of summer wild flowers and lush green grass. It was beautiful. I yank my hand back. "Do you like it?" She twirls around and plops down on a patch of grass, picking some flowers and beginning to braid them in a crown.

"It is pretty nice, I guess," I breath in deeply, taking in the scent of every flower I can. I sit down next to her, delicately, and wish I had a blanket. "I do have something on my mind..." I feel myself release a breath and take another deep one. I don't know why I'm telling Mabel, of all people.

"Yes...?"

"My parents... have been fighting a lot lately. More than usual. It's kinda scary," I am scared. Mabel has all the power in this encounter, something that I was taught is never a good thing. Never let anyone have any power over you. My mom told me that's how she got sucked into marrying this awful man. Referring to my dad. But Mabel isn't awful. She's the best person I know.

"Are you okay?" Her first question. Not what's happening. Not who's fighting who. Not if I'm gonna get money if they divorce. Just if I'm okay. And with that one small exhalation of air, making sounds into coherent words with her vocal chords, I know I love her even more. I turn away, not wanting her to see the tears crowding my eyes. I don't want her to see me this weak.

"Of course," I say, lying through my teeth. I can't decide whether I want her to see through it or not, but for better or worse, she does.

"You are not OKAY!" She screams the last word, scaring some birds. I've never seen her like this.

"Okay, fine... I'll be okay, though. I'll live and they'll live and we'll all die alone and happy!" I yell to this time, surprised at the strength of my voice.

"Stay at the Mystery Shack tonight. I won't be okay if something happens to you," Why does she sound like she cares?

"I'll ask my parents..." I trail off, imagining that train wreck of a conversation.

"No, you won't," Mabel says firmly. She's gonna save my life one of these days. In fact, I think she already has.

"I guess that's okay... they probably won't notice anyway," Mabel nods her head happily.

After a few hours we finally leave the forest. The Mystery Shack looms ahead of us, looking like it could have been welcoming, but my demons tell me to stay away. I ignore them. We walk in and instantly I am amazed. The gift shop and the real house part are so... vastly different. It was comfortable in here, like someplace someone might really get sleep at night (which is kinda ironic, because we all know Dipper gets, like, no sleep) or the place where someone would not hide in their bedroom, waiting for the ebb tide of arguments. It feels like a real home.

"You like already, don't you?" Mabel twirls around. How does she read me so well? Mabel smiled, as if reading my thoughts. This is getting kinda creepy, but I do like this place, much better than my house.

"Yeah," I say, nodding, even though she needs no more affirmation.

"Let me show you where you'll be sleeping tonight! It'll be like a sleepover!" Mabel's joy is infectious, and soon I find myself smiling as we walk up the stairs into her attic bedroom.

"It's kinda cold up here. How do you sleep in this every night?" Mabel just laughs at my question.

"Here," she answers, holding out a sweater. It is light pink with dark pink hearts scattered all across it. I take off my royal purple cardigan and slip on her sweater. It's surprisingly soft. I don't even know whether she likes me, but maybe sometime I'll tell her because this sweater seems so brave compared to me. These hearts are killing me though. We spend the rest of the day in silence, both of us having our respective thoughts, and Mabel is, of course, crafting too. I sit in her room on the rough wood floor, waiting for the day to end so I can go to sleep so I can wake up again so I can wait out another day and waste my breath so I can go to sleep again so maybe someday I can finally get out of my mad house. Finally, after 2 meals and quite a few awkward encounters with other people, it is time to sleep. Mabel has rolled out a blanket and pillow for me. I can't help but think how sweet it is. No one ever does stuff like this for me unless they're payed to. But her.

"Oh, hi again, Pacifica," Dipper sounds unsurprised.

"Hello," I respond coldly.

"And... goodnight," Dipper says, sounding exasperated. He lays down in his bed, turning away from Mabel's side and picking up a book.

I pull up the blanket Mabel provided for me and I turn away from him. Mabel is already asleep. The night begins. I fall asleep fairly quickly, quicker than I would have a my house, where my parents are no doubt still fighting. Or maybe they're being silent. But the deadly kind. My sleep is deeper than I've had in a long time, and when I am woken up by someone whispering my name, I feel refreshed.

"Pacifica," Mabel's soft, sweet voice whispers in my ear. "Pacifica, wake up!" her voice rises slightly over a whisper in excitement.

"Whampf?" I mumble, not used to liking sleep. I don't want to get up, but Mabel pulls me to my feet anyway. "What?" I whisper back, not really wanting to wake Dipper.

"Look!" She points out the window, where it is mostly pitch black, but I can see ever so barely a hint of watery yellow peeping up through the trees. "The sunrise! Let's go outside!" She sounds so excited, I can't bare to say no. So I nod, and she pulls me down the stairs. We tumble and I'm surprised that the noise doesn't wake anyone up. They're probably used to by now. We end up outside and I see what she says. The sunrise is much more beautiful than I remember. It reminds me how much I used to love getting up early and looking outside to see the sunrise, then staying up late to watch the sun fall behind the trees. But today, I have more of a goal. This sweater has made me so brave.

"Mabel, I love you," I hear myself say. I am not even regretting this. Yet.

"I love you to," she walks in front of me and puts her hands around my neck. And kisses me. We stay there for awhile, even after I pull away, she keeps her arms around me. I realize how very blind I've been all my life. One breath can change someone's life. For better, for worse. One "I love you" can make someone still feel like living in a world that seems so very unforgiving sometimes. We all need to hear it sometimes.

"Mabel," I start, feeling wonderful. "I need to go do something. I'll be back." I run off down the road, into town, towards my house.

 **A/N: Cliffhangers, guys! This story will have a sequel, in case you're wondering. Hope you enjoyed!**


	2. Breathing Into Rebirth

I felt bad as I was running away from my newfound love, but I have something to do that just might save my family, and me. I need to tell them something. Something I have never said before honestly. Mabel was sweet, and I don't want to take advantage of that, but she would understand. Mabel had to understand. I can feel the warm breeze in my long hair as I run, which is almost impossible in boots. I must look the most disheveled this town has ever seen me, 'cause people, everyone in fact, are staring at me. I know I didn't put on any makeup, and my boots are starting to fall apart, and I have Mabel's sweater on, but really, I can't look that bad, right? I arrive at my house just as I start feeling self conciuos.

"MOM! DAD!" I yell at the top of my lungs. "PARENTS! I NEED TO TALK TO YOU!" I hear soft steps in the other room, down the hall, and to the front door where I stand. My mom, tear stained and red eyed, comes into veiw and I can't help but feel bad for screaming. But I need to do this. My dad comes walking in with his loud foot thomps. He looks surprised more than anything. I guess he won their latest fight. With what I'm about to say, I hope it's their last. "Hello, family. I have something to say to both of you. I love you. I want to tell you that I hate it when you fight because I don't feel safe enough to even come out of my room in the mornings sometimes. I want you to stop fighting so much. I realized this when I was with... a friend of mine this morning. I stayed at her house overnight. I wondered if you noticed, or couldn't even tell because I am so quite. You might have realized when I didn't respond to your stupid bell. But the point is, she made me realize how important it is to tell everyone that matters to you that they really do. And I know some people think it's implyed, but it's not. I know I am not the daughter you want me to be, but I want to know that you still love me, no matter who I am. Because above all, that's what parents are supposed to do. Validate evey feeling, and make sure their kid knows that you love them, even when they feel like demon-spawn. Even when you treat them like some sort of hellish crap puddle. I cry myself to sleep sometimes, then hear you laughing in the other room, like you don't hear me sobbing myself to death! I can feel every fight you have in my own bones, and I can't wait to get out of this house that is quite obviously not a home in the mornings! I love you two, but I need you to stop fighting and really notice me before I... I... I leave forever. In one way or another," I was almost crying by the end of this. I didn't plan this. At all. I just wanted to say I loved them, but I went so overboard. I feel the lump in my throat tighten and I know at this point, I am going to cry. So I break down. I land on the floor in front of my mother's stiletos. She doesn't bend down. I cry on the floor there. I pour my heart into a pool of tears at my feet, all the while my parents stand there with this horrified look on both their faces, like I'm a demon or something. I guess in a sense, I am. But not really. I am Pacifica Northwest, richest girl in Gravity Falls. By the look on my dad's face, I won't be a Northwest much longer.

"You look terrible," my mom states, still not doing anything other than staring at me from above. My dad yanks me up by my arm. I am standing now, I think, but tears are still rolling down my face like rain and he doesn't look any happier with me. I tried to stop crying, but it doesn't work. Comparred to them, I have horrible control over my emotions. I guess they hate me for it.

"I know, but do you love me?" I feel like screaming. I don't scream. Northwests never scream.

"Well, every time I see you, I just think about how you could have been... so much. But you gave in to the outside world, to their terrible qualites, and their lesser people. You failed me. I can't house you anymore. I don't love you anymore. Get. Out," Her dad said through gritted teeth. He looked serious. Very serious. And honestly, when he said that, I knew there was nothing I could have ever done to be his daughter. So I walk out, my head held higher than before I walked in. I told them I loved them and they left me for dead. Screw them then. I'mma be a wreck. Let's hope Mabel keeps being Mabel.

My heart feels like it's being ripped apart as I walk slowly back to the Mystery Shack. The wind is warm and the day looks bright and happy. But I don't feel it today. I've reached the breaking point with my parents, I guess. I'll never be going back.

"Hey, Pacifica! How did what you needed to do go?!" Mabel looks happy, but then again she always does.

"I-I... it was terrible. My mom and dad disowned me. I have no family now," I broke down in tears, my old make-up running down my face with vigor. I am a mess already. Mabel runs up to me and hugs me. She rubs my back in circles around the shoulder blades. It feels weirdly good, and I can feel myself start to stop crying, the river ceaseing, and my breath comes slower now. I am calmer. I will be okay, eventually. I hope.

"You have me," Mabel whispers in my ear, then kisses it, just a peck.

"Thank you," I whisper back. I am truly greatful that Mabel can see past my thorns and snootieness and see that I am dying inside. She is going to save me. Maybe she already has. We walk inside, hand in hand. I am completely clueless about what's going to happen now. I don't know how I am going to deal with never going back to the Mansion again. I like the Mystery Shack, but I'm going to miss my parents.

"I don't know anymore. I don't know anything without them," I say, my voice shaking badly. We stand there for a minute, surounded by a sense of home.

"I don't know what's going to happen either, but that's the beauty of living! I make my destiny! So this is just another chance to remake yourself and be better than you were before!" Mabel cries out, happily, like she has ever gone through this before. But it dawns on me that maybe she has... Maybe that's why she's like she is. Maybe she chooses to be happy like this. "Come on, let's go dance in the flowers!" She pulls my hand and starts running, and today I decide to run with her. We look like a crappy romance movie again, but this time it's on purpose.

We dance til sunset. It's amazing. I have never taken this much joy in anything for a long time. There is mud on my shoes and the bottom of my dress, but I really don't care now. The flowers are beautiful and spring up even when we step on them. I want to be able to that. To just pop right back up after feeling so very dead. It was warm and balmy and the trees were perfectly place to keep us warm, but not hot. The flowers were every shade of every color of the infinte rainbow, from a deep ruby red that resembled blood to a light, happy violet that made me think of my old room when I was a toddler. I flop down as the sun starts it's setting and realize how much I've missed, trapped up with my parents wishes. The grass and flowers beneth me are soft, like carpet and the sunset looks like fire. I can feel a soft breeze on my face as I close my eyes.

"Let's stay here tonight!" Mabel suggests, laying down next to me.

"Okay. That'll be fun!" I breath out and inhale into a new me.


End file.
